The Hardship and The Joy

"If by doing music you have a great feeling of joy and you'll accept the hardship and your family accepts it, if it's the drive in your life and the beauty of expression in your life, then do it and know that it's going to be very difficult, but the love will make up for all the hardship"
David Brubeck

This quote is a jem, something I wasn't expecting to read when I downloaded Natalie Walker's latest, "Spark", and started looking through the digital booklet. On the last page, all by itself, was this quote. How brilliant, and how beautiful, I thought. How me.

Anyone who has spoken to me recently about my music knows the story. After months of struggle, my computer finally died, and essentially so did any means of making music. As I patiently wait to get the necessary hardware, as the music stews inside all the more, I still feel the want, the need, the absolutely insane passion to create something meaningful and inspired. Still, I can't help but feel the timing is right, and there's a reason things have happened the way they have. There's a reason I focused so intensely on other things, like my husband, my job in marketing, my best friend's weddings, so many artists' music, and dived deeper into my spirituality than I had in years. I had to live.

When you have a passion, you have to feed it. You have to get dirty and reach into the muddy waters to pull out the pretty treasure. It's good to get distracted sometimes, because it gives you character. The more I think about it, the more I realize how boring life would be if I wasn't doing all those other things, trying other things and making a bigger life for myself. If music was my entire life, that would be cool. But if I didn't have the other stuff, my music might be pretty one dimensional. All my life, all the years I've sung songs and written, I get pulled away from time to time, forced to put my efforts into other important matters. But I always come back with renewed vigor. I suppose I believe, deep down, it will be worth it, and my journey will never be done.

Of course all this means is my own expectations will be higher than ever. So here's to expanding, living my busy life as I create melodies and every day becoming more and more the person, and the artist, I'm meant to be.